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Welcome to my About Me page, I’m Melanie. 

Hey Boo Hey,

I am a writer, coach, and facilitator of healing. 

Relational trauma has followed me throughout my life, and the effects live within me. Let me tell you, the mind, body, heart, and spirit are not untouched by the pain that trauma can bring.

As my awareness expanded, I could see how my lived experiences shaped my limiting beliefs and habitual patterns. I became aware of the toxic traits I had adopted that affected how I related to myself and my relationships.

My lack of self-love slowly ate away at my spirit.

I had to change how I related to myself, so I began approaching myself and my shadows with patience and compassion.

Since walking this conscious path, I have made it my intention and mission to share my story, knowledge, and wisdom. I hope you receive what you need to encourage and expand that light already within you.

Discovering who you are and grounding yourself in love and authenticity will change the trajectory of your life and how you relate to the world.

Each day you rise set the intention to love yourself!

“Illuminate the dark and shine radiantly within.”

Until the next time,

           xo Melanie Carolyn

Digging more into Mel

Hey boo hey, 

Thank you so much for reading my about me page. I’m Mel and I feel as though I have lived many lifetimes. I used to say that I was a 27-year-old in a 70-year old’s body or that I was going to die early.

That was a serious belief because I was carrying so much trauma in my body, and my spirit was so tired. But today I know that I was wrong and those thoughts and feelings I had then are no longer present.

For years, I allowed my state of being to be altered by my critical thoughts, my limiting beliefs, and stories that were not me. My behavior patterns would play out sub-consciously in my relationships. I attracted partners that I thought I could change when in reality what I needed to change was myself.

My mother struggles with addiction, sexual abuse and was in numerous abusive relationships, as well as her mother before her. My own experience with relational trauma started in my adolescent years and boy, did that really fuck me up. Generational trauma is true thing.

I grew up in survival mode, living with the responsibilities of taking care of my siblings and in some cases, my mom. I was roaming the streets at 10 years old and smoking cigarettes behind the large tree in our back yard. That was also the age I started exploring my sexuality.

When my dad got custody of me at age 12, I was told that my sister and I were leaving for our normal summer visit, like we did every summer, and to bring anything I might want. I thought that peculiar and I left many prized possessions. I didn’t know it at the time, I never was going to be living with my mom again. No good-bye to my teachers, friends, stepdad, or brother. “Poof, she gone!”

Our summer with dad ended up being an 8-year visit. I was raised by a wicked stepmother and a narcissistic father; both emotionally unavailable and abusive. I was raised to compete with my sibling for love and attention. I conformed and became a 5-star people pleaser, tucking my true self away in my personal cave. I hid in the deepest depths where it was hollow and dark. No one noticed and I was safe.  

What felt safe was a detriment to me. A dark, hollow cave does not allow for light and love. I was a struggling flower quenching for water and air. I was unable to blossom. I placed my efforts into tending to everyone else’s garden when I didn’t have two scoops of my own soil to work with.  

In junior high and just into high school, I became bulimic to cope with how I felt about my insides and outsides. I felt so much energy that I had to repress constantly. I had to be perfect. Be what everyone else needed and wanted me to be. I was uncomfortable with the world around me so I never put myself out there.

Although my voice was overpowered, I always expressed myself on pen and paper. I began to write poetry when I was thirteen years old and I still have some to this day.

It was a gateway into a world where I could be free, I could be me. My mind became clear as the ink hit the pages. I was in my cave between the words but here I was safe.

By the time I was 21, I was 7 months pregnant and with a man that I tried to leave several times. I was solely dependent on the abuser and all I could think about was how to end my life. I had it all planned out and could even see it. My baby and I were going to go away. I’m obviously still here, but it wasn’t the last time that I thought about ending this human experience of mine.

After three and a half years of emotional, mental, and physical abuse, I was able to separate from my son’s father, but I would have to deal with him for the rest of my life. By the time my son was a year old, I was a single mom living with my dad.

At 23 I met Josh and he was my knight in shining armor. He was sweet, funny in the nerdy kind of way, smart, and creative. We had a good time together and, in all honesty, he had a lot more going for him than my previous boyfriends. I fell in love and he with me.

It was a great match. We had our struggles at the start of our relationship, but it was nothing that he and I did not overcome. I was committed and so was he. Two years later, we both stood at the alter and said our vows.

Josh and I have been in a polyamorous relationship for the majority of our marriage and when the twins were about two, I entered into an abusive relationship that lasted three years. Three years of hell at that.  

He was a charmer for certain; big brown eyes, tall, and handsome. He was fun, expressive and exciting. This man was also dangerous. I should have ended it when I first saw the red flags, but I didn’t. Instead, I had it in my head that this person loved me, and I was going to be the one to save him from his half gallon of Vodka every 2 days addiction.

Just as I did when I was younger, I thought I could save this man. Seriously ya’ll, I really thought that I was going to be saving him. I was o’ so fucking wrong.  

I didn’t recognize or know my own self. I hated myself with every fiber for being so stuck. I was locked in his cage, with no fucking way out.

I felt my worth depended on his actions. If he loved me, he would stop drinking and driving. If he loved me, he would respect me. If he loved me, he would touch me. If he loved me, he would stop drinking. Period. He did nothing but lie and deceive me and I knew better. Or at least, I thought I did.

See the thing is, love does not depend on ‘if’s. I realized in that moment that I could not let myself drown. I had to swim from the depths of his ocean that swallowed me whole and get away as quickly as I could. I had spent a good part of a year trying to get away from him, only to get swallowed up again and again.

So, wtf to do next?

Well, I was doing a shit ton of soul searching. I finally, finally, and may I say again, finally got away from my now and forever never to speak to again ex.

MMM it feels so good to type that. That relationship was one of the hardest things I ever put myself through and to get away from.

Three years later, I’m on the ultimate Self-discovery journey. I quit my job so that I may share my story.

I have taken a leap of faith and want to invest in myself. I want to live in a world where I’m free to live authentically me. To shed the toxicity within me and to rise every morning radiantly loving myself.

 I have dedicated myself to continue to investigate, heal, and transform. To love and embrace all parts of myself with compassion. I journey this path so that I may share my wisdom, experiences, and WTF moments with all.

My passion for this work drove me to learn different healing models, to educate myself, and do the work. I will continue to transform and help women do the same.

By no means is my journey of self-discovery over, I learn something about myself that surprises me all the time. I am being challenged and triggered. I cry and I scream but I know that there is a purpose in my life, a reason why I am here, and I believe that purpose is you.

You are here for a reason. Whether it is that you resonate with some of my story and you find comfort in the words written. Or you have experienced toxicity, and you need to know that somewhere out there someone has gotten through it. Maybe you’re here so that you can explore ways to gain a deeper connection with yourself? Live life in awareness? Whatever the reason is, I hope it was what you needed.

 

 

Together, we will hold a tender space for You to explore ways to deepen your awareness.

When focusing time on your expansion, you’ll notice limiting beliefs and behaviors that may prevent you from moving forward. 

Let’s explore things together!

Whether you want to further your healing from your toxic relationship or deepen your relationship with yourself, I’m here for it. 

Bettering ourselves is a work of tenacity.  

I know firsthand that healing and evolving is a process. When I started to embody inner awareness, I began to truly see myself. 

When working with me you will practice awareness. You will deepen the relationship with yourself. 

Open yourself up to discovering and releasing parts of you that that are being called to go into the ether.

From a place of love and compassion, join me as I guide you through meditation and somatic practices to deepen the connection with yourself.

 

Reiki Healing

Reiki is the facilitation of deep relaxation, healing and balance of energies. As a Certified Reiki practitioner, I aim to create a safe comfortable space for you to release energy that is not life giving and facilitate energy that can easily flow.

Meditation

Meditation is the ultimate awareness practice. Combined with breathing techniques, mindfulness practices, and mind-body healing practices, you will gain the ability to see deeper within yourself. 

Self-Discovery Coaching

Are you on a journey of self-discovery? Finally ready to be relieved of the aftermath of living with relational trauma? Dive deeper to understand your habitual patterns, thinking and limiting beliefs. It is my intention that you love yourself completely and step into your authentic self. Live life making choices that are aligned with your higher self.  Most of all, I am here for you. Please check out RSCC Services page. 

Radiant Clients

Chase the Sun

“For years I have given to those around me and neglected myself. I rarely felt joy and often felt unworthy of love, care, and respect. This narrative of “unworthiness” was part of a defense system I built to protect myself from my past trauma. Mel helped me see that I am no longer a child in a powerless situation; I am an adult with the power to choose who I want in my life and who to listen to. I have the power to choose how I respond to situations and to carve a new path for myself – one where the love, care, and compassion I give myself amplifies the joy I feel and the love and care I give to those around me.”  Heather Olson

Sun Chaser Testimony

“Mel was relaxed, natural, and, most importantly, empowering. She understood who I am and connected with me” Jennifer Butler

Sun Chaser Testimony

“Mel is a super coach! She held a great presence of ease. She really understood my story and helped me formulate a mantra to help carry me through a certain problematic time of day with grace and compassion for myself and my children. She also made sure I set up the conditions for success. It has served me well. Thanks again, Mel!”  Leah Brown

Discover, Investigate, Heal, and Transform

Awareness is Key, Knowledge is Power. If you have a question about self-discovery, healing, and transformation, don’t hesitate to ask. I love a curious mind.

Ask Mel